Ah New Year's resolutions....the familiar ritual; discontented with where we are or who we are, setting the same goals we did last year.
More often than not the voice inside our head is already rolling it's eyes telling us we won't change this year either!
It's easy to have lofty goals and dreams of how we'd like to be by the end of 2019 but these dreams and goals need to be rooted in reality, they need to be our hearts desire and something we're willing to work for.
Now there's the crunch, work.
We all want a quick fix, that's why fad diets are popular and why the pharmaceutical companies are so successful.
Whatever we want fixed in our lives we want it done quick and easy. The work is just too hard, too painful, takes too long!
Whatever we want to fix or change in our lives, is the product of our life so far. In otherwords; our words, thoughts and actions have created who we are today and where we are today. That's right, you, me, us, we're our own creators and we have to accept that it's our life choices that got us where we are right now.
Okay, okay so that's not 100% true. Life is more complex than that, certain situations, someone else's words or actions do contribute to who we are today. However if we're honest with ourselves, it is true that most of us find it too uncomfortable to actually take responsibility for the things we don't like about our lives or ourselves.
I discovered a 'saying' that I have found very useful and meaningful over the last few weeks.
"Let go of what was, surrender to what is and have faith in what will be."
Some of you will read that and think well there's no real work in that, that's just saying give up, go with the flow, accept 'it is what it is' and faithfully just believe it will all be ok without actually doing anything!
The more I repeated this in my head however, the more it made me think about the deeper meaning, the work involved.
To let go of what was, requires us to release old habits! Wow, now that does take work does it not??!!
To surrender to the now means accepting that where you are and who you are is ok. Liking ourselves, being happy with what we have.....ouch, that's not how we're conditioned to think is it?!
Have faith in what will be.....I don't believe blind wishful thinking is what this refers to.
My interpretation of this is to have faith in yourself, in where you have set your compass. To keep working towards your goals and dreams even when it gets hard. Have faith in your intentions, sometimes the destination wasn't what you expected!
We have to start with self reflection, this is work for sure. Untangle the web of thoughts, words and actions that made you who you are today and your life where it is today. When you start to pick out the thoughts, words or actions that have brought you to the things you want to change about your life or yourself, those are the things you to need to let go of before you can make any real changes.
Until that is done, nothing will change. The same cycle of not achieving those annual New Years resolutions will continue.
The next step is to surrender to what is, accept that right now, in this moment, this is who you are and your life is how it is - smile!
Smile because life is only ever experienced in the present moment, learn to find joy and acceptance in the now, life will certainly become sweeter if you can!
Now, now you can set goals and intentions for 2019, for 5 or 10 years from now, for the rest of your life; because they come from a joyful place, from a place that's willing to accept responsibility for thoughts, words and actions. They will be meaningful to you.
Set them down on paper, send them out into the world. Be proud of your goals and intentions, work towards them with every thought, word and action, then when you have truly committed to yourself, to your truest heartfelt intentions, have faith in what will be!
It's an interesting and intricate process, what I discovered is that my goals and intentions weren't what I thought they were.
When I discovered what are meaningful goals and intentions to me, the work became less arduous. It does take commitment and work but it's a commitment to yourself, to your hearts desire, to experiencing joy in the mundane.
Life is for living and loving - right now!
Happy New year!